The Guilty Reader Tag

I saw Jean from Jean Bookishthoughts do this tag on YouTube and I loved it! It was created by ReadLikeWildfire and I though I’d give it a go myself.

I haven’t been a huge reader in my teenage years and now that I’m officially an adult, I have started enjoying it more. My “read” bookshelf on goodreads.com isn’t as rich as I would love, but I’m trying.

Without much further ado, let’s go!

Have You Ever Re-gifted A Book That You’ve Been Given?

I don’t believe I’ve ever done it. Although… my mom is under the impression that a couple of my books are hers and since I didn’t really like them, I haven’t told her the truth yet.

Have you ever said you’ve read a book when you haven’t?

Yes. Probably in school. Definitely in school. The first one that comes to mind is Alessandro Manzoni’s “I promessi Sposi” (The Betrothed). We read it in italian class and I was supposed to finish in during the summer. I never did. I couldn’t care less about it.

Have you ever borrowed a book and not returned it?

No. I don’t think so. Other people haven’t returned books I have lent them.

Have you ever read a series out of order?

Yes. I am ashamed to admit it, but I read Harry Potter out of order. I started with the second one and after my mom bought me the first one, I read them consequently.

Have you ever spoiled a book for someone?

No. I’m not a monster!

Have you ever doggy eared a book?

The only one I did doggy eared was Matilda by Roald Dahl when I was 7. And I regretted it as soon as I did it. Other than that, I remember using post-its to mark my favourite parts of “Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince”.

Have you ever told someone you don’t own a book when you do?

No… I’m not ashamed of the books I read. If I read them, there is a reason. Even “Twilight”. I loved it in middle school!

Have you ever told someone you haven’t read a book when you have?

Most definitely. In school. To avoid having to make a report about it. Writing a mandatory report on any book will make you hate it. I was probably Giorgio Faletti’s “Io uccido” and Alessandro Baricco “Novecento”.

Have you every skipped a chapter or a section of a book?

I try not to skip entire chapters. I skim through them so I don’t waste my time reading them accurately but I still know what it is about. When I attempted to read Lev Tolstoy’s “Anna Karenina”, I HAD to skip some parts otherwise I would have never made it to page 300. After that I gave up.

Have you ever bad mouthed a book you actually liked?

No. I am quite opinionated and I don’t mind saying out loud what I think about something. I might have said I liked a book that I actually didn’t, but it was just for school. I dreaded the follow-up questions like “why didn’t you like it?” or “What are the elements of the book that made you not like it”. I just didn’t! OK?!



Here is my tag! I’ve never done something like this on my blog before and I loved it! I’ll try to find more tags I love, especially regarding tv shows…

xxx

Georgia

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I did it!

I passed my english exam.

I’ve literally just found out! I ran to my mom sobbing and mumbling: “I passed the exam! I got a 28/30!”

After that, I stood there for 10 minutes sheding litres and litres of tears. My mom and I talked some more, about my uni life and the choices I have to make in the next months.

Aside from that, I texted my friend to meet me saturday for our traditional celebratory smoothie and I am trying to be more positive. Tomorrow I’m supposed to go to a class and it’s killing me. I have to attend this one, because it’s about poetry in the 16th Century. SO BORING. I’m not really interested in that. I was hoping in more victorian books.

Today I’m going to pay my fee and go for a driving lesson. Despite my numbness regarding everything, I am tying to survive.

 

Trouble at Uni, exams and breakdowns

I don’t even know where to start.

Basically I’ve been studying for a months and a half for absolutely NOTHING.

A couple of weeks ago, I logged into my uni account to book my english exam. And I made a surprising discovery.

Back in June I wrote this post about the fact that I didn’t pass BOTH my exams. I was called Failure and I wrote it while sobbing on my keyboard. So, yeah. Fun times. 😅

This almost pulled me back to my dark place. I was so devastated. I had studied for a long time, without attending class and on my own. Anyway, I thought I hadn’t passed my Literature exam. But in reality I did.

This is what happened.

Instead of telling my mother straightaway, I invented a lame excuse about problems with the University server. I saw it said: “Passed: NO” and I never gave it a second look. You don’t want to go back and have your failures mock you in the face.

So when I logged into my account to book my English exam I noticed there wasn’t the box to book the other one, the English Literature one. And of course I freaked out!

So I went to my “libretto”, the page that contains all my marks and it turns out: I did pass it.

Basically, the whole excuse with the university server was true. I had made it up, but apparently there actually WAS a problem and some marks weren’t registed. Mine included. A week after I saw the mark they sent an email saying that there was a mix up but I didn’t see it.

Of course.

I was so relieved but so unbelievably pissed. I WASTED SO MUCH TIME THAT I COULD HAVE SPENT STUDYING FOR A DIFFERENT EXAM.

Anyway, I got a 22 out of 30. Not particularly well but I thought I hadn’t passed it so it’s definitely an improvement.

I am exhausted by all of this and aside from my imediate family and my best friend, I haven’t told anyone else. And my dad made fun of me for the entire day. My mom started laughing every time our eyes met but now the drama is over.



So yeah. This happened. I know I was stupid: I should have check it my uni emails, but I just didn’t want to see the “no” again.

Next time I’ll be checking my emails every single day. Let me know your crazy university stories! The Uni world is a crazy one!

xxx

Georgia

Failure

I was hoping to pass at least one exam but I didn’t.

I did two and I didn’t pass either of them. Frankly I don’t know what to do. I thought I was strong enough but apparently this has set me back. I don’t deal well with failure. It is something that detroys me from the inside.

And now I have to tell my family. Great. I can already see their faces. I am sure they are not going to make a big deal out of it, especially my mom, since she is the only one who know what I’ve been going through this past year.

Should I lie? Should I just tell people I passed them?

The world I live in is very judgy. And pityful.

I HATE seeing that expression on people’s faces but even more than that, the judgy look that they give you when they take pity on you.

In a couple of days it’s my birthday, but the last thing I want to do is celebrate. I’d rather dig a hole and hide in it until august. (That’s when I will take the exams again.)

I just want this university part of my life to go away. I hate it. I can’t help myself but I really really hate it with all my heart.

I can’t drop out. I just really can’t. But it is destroying me.

I really want to be a teacher and talk in and about English all day. But the journey getting there is ripping me apart piece by piece.

I know that they are just two exams but I really wanted to pass them so I could get them over with and begin the next year with a fresh start.

Now I’m not so sure I will.

Georgia