Riverdale – Season 3’s Cringy and Weird Stuff

Riverdale is not strange to cringy moments. I wrote a whole blog post about them.  Almost every sexual situation that has ever occurred on the show has had understones of weirdness.

Now that THIS has been established by literally everbody on the planet, I have a few things to get off my chest. First of all, if you don’t know, I review every single Riverdale episode! Feel free to check them out and let me know your thoughts!

Let’s get into it!

Kevin and Moose’s Sex Plans

What was that line in the Season 3 Premiere? I was confused and weirded out by it.

Kevin: “You know those movies where friends make a pact…

And this already didn’t look good…

… to lose their virginity by the end of the school year? […] Maybe we should make a similar pact of our own. On a slightly accellerate timetable. Like, by Halloween.”

Moose: 😳😳

Even Moose was like… WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE? Why, writers? What is the purpose of this storyline if you’re not gonna act on it. It’s been 8 episodes and aside from some RROTC stuff in episod 2, nothing.

Like the whole Hot Dads of Riverdale Squad! Where are the hot dads? WHERE ARE FP, TOM and FRED?


After watching The Midnight Club, I was convinced. I ship them okay? They are cute, they have a complicated history, there is incredible sexual tension between them and I love it.

Still, having sex in the same bed their respective children did is weird. I know, I know. Everything has a history and stuff. But is there only one bed in that trailer? Only one? Do FP and Jughead sleep in the same bed? Because that’s a whole kind of weird!


And if that is FP’s bed, why would you bring your girlfriend there, Jughead? WHY?!

Dilton’s Sex Bunker

You guys, I looooooove you’re having a healthy love life, without playing any games and celebrating their sexuality. I love it. They never made a big deal about virginity (aside from Kevin’ weird line [see below]) and that’s so important for me.


Wait just a moment before making it your own private place to have intercourse.

Jailhouse Rock

I told myself I wasn’t going to get angry and start screaming like a maniac so here we go…


Who wrote this and thought, “Yes, this is a good message to send girls.”!? And what’s with the shaking of the fence? I am so angry about this. As I wrote in my review of the episode:

This was stupid. This was misogynistic. It was wrong. On so many levels.

What’s the message here? Seriously? Girl in skimpy skirts cheering and boys being all machos, in prison, playing football?


And everybody was oogling Veronica, Cheryl and Josie! And shaking that damn fence!

And yet, I can’t get that song out of my head. I’ve been listening to it ever since that epiode aired! Even the original Elvis version!

Archie and Veronica’s Prison Sex

Really? Really? Your first thoughts when you see each other for the first time after one of you has been sent to jail is: “LET’S HAVE SEX AGAINST THESE LOCKERS!!!”

As I’ve said before, I’m so glad they are not making having sex a big deal on the show, but the timing is almost always inappropriate.

I mean… Come on guys.

So far… This is it. I’ve been wracking my brain trying to thing of other moments that made me cringe but these are the ones that stood out.

What do you think about it? Am I a prude? Should I just chill and forget about this?

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2 thoughts on “Riverdale – Season 3’s Cringy and Weird Stuff

  1. Honestly, and with the Archie and Veronica prison sex scene it must have been REALLY quick because surely someone would have gone looking for him???? I know it’s a secret underground fight ring but he’s also a prisoner :’)


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